1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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