For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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