the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
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She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
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I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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