just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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