Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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