I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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