weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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