are you still at the devil's house?
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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