omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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