Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
What should our trivia night team be named?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam