Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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