She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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