the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
