he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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