I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He shit in the fireplace
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