yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
two words...techno handjob
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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