ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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