what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
