Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize