Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
