you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
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She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
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CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
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