Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
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