After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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