You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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