remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You are the jesus of drinking
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize