Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
