eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Randomize
