Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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