My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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