How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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