Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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