The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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