I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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