ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
