He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
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