His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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