the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
