she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
