Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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