Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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