yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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