But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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