Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize