Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize