I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
