I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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