Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
