Dude my mom stole all your condoms
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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