As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
