I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
