Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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