im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize