im drinking this country out of the recession.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
